11. Love stories

I went into my local library
Fell into my usual reverie
Over by the romantic shelf
Wondering what to do with myself
Then I spied a lady
She was browsing through the fiction
She reached for Jean Plaidy
I felt a strange constriction

This was to be my moment of truth
I knew I had to appear aloof
Going through the books in my mind
How was I to give her the sign?
Should I give a lordly smile
Or a humble little wave
Try the offhand style
Or appear a little grave?

Iíve got
Love stories, love stories, love stories
All along my wall
Love stories, love stories, love stories
Iíve read them all

I was of course the handsome young man
She the sort who likes to settle down
Or maybe a wild seductress
Or just the usual damsel in distress
So I stood and savoured
My anticipated glory
When Iím carrying her favour
No more will they ignore me

Then a noise brought me around
My sweetheart was nowhere to be found
As I searched around so desperately
The counter girl looked coldly at me
I presented her my books
She was clearly unimpressed
We exchanged knowing looks
Readingís second best

Iím in the air with Heyer
And in the cart with Cartland
All at sea with Segal
And my doom is in du Maurier
My doom is in du Maurier